Wow....another REALLY long day, full of ups and downs, both literally and emotionally. Once again, I find myself with enough thoughts and emotions to write a novel on the days events with only enough time, space, and energy to give the clif-note version.
Our agency and our orphanage told us before we came that our trip would be much better and we would enjoy it much more if we were willing to be flexible and not cling too tightly to our expectations. We now know exactly what that means. There are a few generalizations that we've heard about Haiti. One is that this is the "land of endless impossibilities". Haiti's people encounter impossible situations every day, around every corner, and just do their best to take it all in stride and survive in the best way they can. There's also a general consensus that you don't know anything for sure (or count on anything) until it's actually happening. You may even have to wait until it's happened. Our adoption process has reflected those truths and while we haven't enjoyed all of the obstacles and "impossibilities", we feel that it's fitting that the process has mirrored the culture so accurately.
Today provided several more opportunities for us to let go of our expectations and go with the flow. Right now, all of you that know Matt and I well are laughing at the idea of us "going with the flow". Could it be that God has some character development to do in us on this brief trip? God is the ultimate multi-tasker and can accomplish so many different things in so many different people in the same situation. So, one of the many things he's taught us this week is to learn to really and truly be flexible and let go of our expectations at every opportunity.
Here were the unknowns we faced just this morning...
--would we be able to go to Port au Prince to appear in court?
--would we both be flying home tomorrow or would one of us be staying until next Tuesday?
--when would we get the chance to go see the local judge to sign our paperwork with him?
--would Chelley get to have the Dr. appt that she needed to have today and would we get to go with her?
--how would we divide our time between all of those things and still spending individual time with each of our girls?
--how would our girls respond to us in our time together today?
So, here's how it all played out. We spent time with Chelley from 8:30-10 am. She wasn't quite as playful or open with us as yesterday and seemed to be a bit overwhelmed by everything. The hardest part as an adoptive parent in that situation is that you want with all of your being to make it better, to do what you can to ease your child's discomfort or sadness. But you can't...because you are part of the problem, not part of the solution....yet. Eventually, we will get to be the ones who comfort and make it better but that's not the case yet. So, even though we love them to pieces, we must allow them to seek the comfort they need from the caregivers that they know and trust.
We found out at 10 am that we would get to head to the courts and we quickly prepared for the long, winding, and bumpy hour drive back down into Port au Prince. Praise God that we were able to get that taken care of today. All it consisted of was us appearing in the court building and waiting for 10 minutes while a clerk took copies of our passports...that was it! Good thing we didn't have to rearrange so many things for a 10 minute appt next Tuesday! We were back to the orphanage by 12:30 pm but by then, both girls were resting. At 2:30 pm, we got word that we could go to see the "local" judge. That involved another bumpy but breathtakingly beautiful ride farther up the mountain to go see Judge Bob and take 5 minutes to sign our names in his presence. We were back to GLA again by about 4 pm. That left us 30 minutes with Naika before we got picked up at 4:30 to drive almost all the way back down to Port au Prince for Chelley's Dr. appt. 30 minutes was not enough to love on Naika today and she wasn't thrilled with us for part of that time either. We decided to divide and conquer so Matt stayed with Naika and I went with Chelley and 2 of the GLA staff to the Dr appt.
The appt was not for a big problem but just something to have checked out. Chelley just has some pain in her hip joints from time to time and it causes her to limp or not want to be on her feet. We saw a wonderful orthopedic Dr who spoke fluent English, French, and Creole. He was able to rule out anything serious and gave us a simple and reasonable way to deal with it if it flares up again. The only problem was that it's the rainy season in Haiti and it was POURING down rain when we got to his office. Our appt was at 5 pm local time and I had brought nothing with me...no food, no activities for Chelley, etc. The GLA staff are often prepared with bags for the kids for these occasions but they thought we'd just be in and out so Chelley wouldn't need it. However, the Dr. wasn't there when we arrived and as it turned out, he got stuck in another of Haiti's "impossibilities". He was stuck in a traffic jam caused by a rockslide and muddy flood. He showed up at his office at 6:30 pm but we were 3rd in line. Yet another chance to be flexible! It was a long wait and we were all hungry and tired by the time we got home at almost 8 pm. However, I got the rare chance to get to experience this appt with Chelley and very few other adoptive parents have that opportunity. I also got to spend all that time with Chelley on my lap or holding my hand and that was priceless and worth every minute! And I got to hear some wonderful insights from one of the GLA staff that is with Chelley all the time about her life, about the adoption process, and about what the kids understand about what is happening with all of these adoptions.
Now it's time to recover from this marathon day, pack our belongings, and prepare to spend about 2 hours with each of them separately tomorrow before we say goodbye. Thanks for reading all the way through another marathon post and for your constant prayers.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Learning to be flexible
It is hard to have so much to share and such limited time to share it. I know that not all of my dearest friends are on facebook so I want to make sure I keep everyone as up to speed as possible on all that is happening.
Brief run-down of our day...left here at 6 am to get to the U.S. Embassy for our 7:30 appt with the other 2 American couples that we are with. Have learned a great deal about Haitian culture and the complete lack of Haitian driving laws just from these rides up and down the mountain but that's a whole other post! :) We got to the embassy...waited, were seen, waited some more, were interviewed and then were released from there about 10 am. We thought we were on track for a smooth and fairly quick day. Then it took about another hour of crazy driving to get to the courthouse. Both the embassy and the courthouse are in Port au Prince but the traffic and the roads are apparently especially bad between those 2 buildings, which is really saying something! So we took a longer journey up and around and then back down to get to the courthouse.
We found out on the way that the judge we were supposed to see is out until next Tuesday...oops! But we went to the courthouse anyway because our orphanage thought they could still get us in to do what needs to be done...which really just amounts to a clerk copying some pages in our passports. Ugh. After waiting a half hour, the director of our orphanage called and said it simply wasn't going to happen today. She'd been on the phone for 30 minutes trying to make it work and it was out of the question.
So, we'll find out tomorrow whether or not we'll get special permission to go back to Port au Prince tomorrow and have a different clerk from a different court do it for us....or, someone from each family has to stay until next Tuesday and try it again when the judge gets back to town.
Honestly, I don't even know what to pray for right now so pray as you feel God leading you. In some ways, its best to just get it done tomorrow. That saves, time, money, and complications in so many ways. However, it also takes away our only full day at the orphanage and means that our time with our girls will be drastically reduced tomorrow. That makes me sad. The idea of one of us staying means that one of us would get more time with them but obviously makes everything more complicated.
As far as seeing the girls today, we've gotten to see glimpses of Chelley coming and going from her class with her school mates. Their classroom is on the main floor of the guest house in which we are staying. So, that has brought joy to my heart and she's given us a couple of smiles in those interactions today. The plan is to hang out with her from 3-5 pm in her environment, called the Toddler House, which we didn't get to see at all yesterday. Can't wait to see her in her space, with her friends. Then tonight we'll have dinner at the main house and hopefully get a little bit of time with Naika before bed.
That's what I know for now. Thanks for your love and your prayers!
Brief run-down of our day...left here at 6 am to get to the U.S. Embassy for our 7:30 appt with the other 2 American couples that we are with. Have learned a great deal about Haitian culture and the complete lack of Haitian driving laws just from these rides up and down the mountain but that's a whole other post! :) We got to the embassy...waited, were seen, waited some more, were interviewed and then were released from there about 10 am. We thought we were on track for a smooth and fairly quick day. Then it took about another hour of crazy driving to get to the courthouse. Both the embassy and the courthouse are in Port au Prince but the traffic and the roads are apparently especially bad between those 2 buildings, which is really saying something! So we took a longer journey up and around and then back down to get to the courthouse.
We found out on the way that the judge we were supposed to see is out until next Tuesday...oops! But we went to the courthouse anyway because our orphanage thought they could still get us in to do what needs to be done...which really just amounts to a clerk copying some pages in our passports. Ugh. After waiting a half hour, the director of our orphanage called and said it simply wasn't going to happen today. She'd been on the phone for 30 minutes trying to make it work and it was out of the question.
So, we'll find out tomorrow whether or not we'll get special permission to go back to Port au Prince tomorrow and have a different clerk from a different court do it for us....or, someone from each family has to stay until next Tuesday and try it again when the judge gets back to town.
Honestly, I don't even know what to pray for right now so pray as you feel God leading you. In some ways, its best to just get it done tomorrow. That saves, time, money, and complications in so many ways. However, it also takes away our only full day at the orphanage and means that our time with our girls will be drastically reduced tomorrow. That makes me sad. The idea of one of us staying means that one of us would get more time with them but obviously makes everything more complicated.
As far as seeing the girls today, we've gotten to see glimpses of Chelley coming and going from her class with her school mates. Their classroom is on the main floor of the guest house in which we are staying. So, that has brought joy to my heart and she's given us a couple of smiles in those interactions today. The plan is to hang out with her from 3-5 pm in her environment, called the Toddler House, which we didn't get to see at all yesterday. Can't wait to see her in her space, with her friends. Then tonight we'll have dinner at the main house and hopefully get a little bit of time with Naika before bed.
That's what I know for now. Thanks for your love and your prayers!
Meeting our precious girls
It's the wee hours of the morning on Wednesday, May 22, 2013 and I have a brief moment to update you all quickly before we head to Port au Prince for a busy day of embassy and court appts. (Of course, busy in regards to Haiti = hurry up and wait and above all...be flexible about everything!!)
We did get to spend some priceless and wonderful time with Chelley and Naika yesterday morning. We arrived at the orphanage about 10:30 am...after mostly smooth flights and a not-so-smooth drive up into the beautiful Haitian mountains. We were taken directly to the Main House, where all the littlest ones live, and both Chelley and Naika were waiting on one of the balconies for us. We had some of the wonderful GLA staff with us to introduce us to the girls and to help them feel comfortable as we spent those initial moments together. The girls were understandably quiet and reserved at first, although Chelley was willing to hug us right away. They warmed up quickly, especially when we got out the presents and snacks we'd brought them. They were willing to sit on our laps and play with us, and by the end of our time together, Naika didn't want me to put her down. If I set her down to play with something, she turned around and reached for me. Oh so good for this mama's heart. Neither girl said much of anything, although they both do talk quite a bit when in their element. They did however reward us with some of their priceless and beautiful smiles. The GLA staff were surprised at how quickly Naika warmed up to us. Chelley was her usual bright and smiley self. Praise God for all the answered prayers. We had about 1 1/2 hours with them before we had to leave them for lunch. We had little bits of time with each of them individually after lunch and hope to get to spend some more time with them this afternoon after we return from Port au Prince.
It is still quite unreal to actually be here, to see and hold them in person and we are taking as much video and as many pictures as possible so that we can remember these life-changing moments. They are even more beautiful and precious in person than they are in their pictures. Speaking of pictures, I will try to upload some at some point but don't have the means right now. I'll try to update more later but will end this post with the lyrics to the song that so completely mirrors my heart right now. This song, written by two adoptive daddies...Mark Hall (of Casting Crowns) and Steven Curtis Chapman, is the reason for the name of our blog. Read the lyrics and then go listen to it on youtube...it's amazing!
You were broken, abandoned
And crying all alone
We were waiting and praying
And longing to bring you home
And then we saw your face
In a moment you were wrapped up in our hearts
We took a step of faith
And now here we are
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
From a world away, I journeyed
Just to hold your hand
You will never be alone again
I've come so far to find you
So far to find you
You were fighting and fearful
You were hiding your heart away
But I was trying so hard to show you
รข€˜Cause there were no words that I could say
If you could see my heart
You would know that all I want to do
Is care for you
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Here in your eyes I see
Reflections of myself
How I'm the child that's really running
But I can hear a voice that's whispering my name
Saying come to me, don't run from me
I'm all you need and I am calling
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
(I have come so far)
Will you take my love and give up the fight
(I have come so far)
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
From Heaven's throne
Down to a rugged cross I came
It was My love for you that brought Me all the way
So far to find you
So far to find you
We did get to spend some priceless and wonderful time with Chelley and Naika yesterday morning. We arrived at the orphanage about 10:30 am...after mostly smooth flights and a not-so-smooth drive up into the beautiful Haitian mountains. We were taken directly to the Main House, where all the littlest ones live, and both Chelley and Naika were waiting on one of the balconies for us. We had some of the wonderful GLA staff with us to introduce us to the girls and to help them feel comfortable as we spent those initial moments together. The girls were understandably quiet and reserved at first, although Chelley was willing to hug us right away. They warmed up quickly, especially when we got out the presents and snacks we'd brought them. They were willing to sit on our laps and play with us, and by the end of our time together, Naika didn't want me to put her down. If I set her down to play with something, she turned around and reached for me. Oh so good for this mama's heart. Neither girl said much of anything, although they both do talk quite a bit when in their element. They did however reward us with some of their priceless and beautiful smiles. The GLA staff were surprised at how quickly Naika warmed up to us. Chelley was her usual bright and smiley self. Praise God for all the answered prayers. We had about 1 1/2 hours with them before we had to leave them for lunch. We had little bits of time with each of them individually after lunch and hope to get to spend some more time with them this afternoon after we return from Port au Prince.
It is still quite unreal to actually be here, to see and hold them in person and we are taking as much video and as many pictures as possible so that we can remember these life-changing moments. They are even more beautiful and precious in person than they are in their pictures. Speaking of pictures, I will try to upload some at some point but don't have the means right now. I'll try to update more later but will end this post with the lyrics to the song that so completely mirrors my heart right now. This song, written by two adoptive daddies...Mark Hall (of Casting Crowns) and Steven Curtis Chapman, is the reason for the name of our blog. Read the lyrics and then go listen to it on youtube...it's amazing!
You were broken, abandoned
And crying all alone
We were waiting and praying
And longing to bring you home
And then we saw your face
In a moment you were wrapped up in our hearts
We took a step of faith
And now here we are
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
From a world away, I journeyed
Just to hold your hand
You will never be alone again
I've come so far to find you
So far to find you
You were fighting and fearful
You were hiding your heart away
But I was trying so hard to show you
รข€˜Cause there were no words that I could say
If you could see my heart
You would know that all I want to do
Is care for you
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Here in your eyes I see
Reflections of myself
How I'm the child that's really running
But I can hear a voice that's whispering my name
Saying come to me, don't run from me
I'm all you need and I am calling
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
(I have come so far)
Will you take my love and give up the fight
(I have come so far)
Will you let me hold you in my arms tonight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
Will you take my love and give up the fight
I have come so far to find you
So far to find you
From Heaven's throne
Down to a rugged cross I came
It was My love for you that brought Me all the way
So far to find you
So far to find you
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